When your stomach growls, eat grass! (April 28)

H'lo! How are my lovely Tejanos? This sister missionary is quite lovely, if I do say so myself--not in a prideful way, of course! This week was chalk-full of funny moments and great missionary experiences. Oh my goodness. I'm laughing just thinking of them all. But first....you know the drill. Word of the Week! "Be Chill My Soul": A motto by which all missionaries should live. It makes it so you feel at ease with your area, your terrible companion and helps you remember that things are just more fun when you are chill. But really y'all. Everything really is so much more fun when I'm not so up-tight. Some missionaries don't understand that you can be obedient and have fun, thus they are robots. After all, I'm living a pretty strict life for 15 and a half more months. I need to be chill or I'll lose my mind. Let's be honest here! Alright, time for a weekly recap! Last P-day, we went hiking at 3 Fingers in Jordan Valley aka in the middle of NOWHERE. It was gorgeous, nonetheless. Elder Hatefi tried to chase a cow and he looked the fool, that's for sure. In addition to chasing a cow, we had to explain to him the difference between a cow and a bull. The contrast is obvious. Cows have utters. Bulls don't. So, Hatefi was looking at all the cows and said, "Haha, that cow has a really small utter. I wonder if she gets made fun of by all the other cows!" Yep. That's my district leader. It's safe to say, I've been sick pretty much all week. Easter was the worst of it, but ever since I've been battling a cold. Nevertheless, my sickly being hasn't kept me from doing work. We visited Ashley Sabin on Tuesday with the Elders since they can't get into her house in the afternoon, and she is awesome. We've gone with them to visit her quite a few times. She just loves us. She's HI-larious! Then, I felt sickly so we went home and "chilled" while I tried to feel better. Now, after the meds kicked in, we went to dinner. Oh yeah. Dinner was quite an experience. Our dinner appointment was at the Carters. We walked in and I saw Kenny that I had met previously in Frisco at the YSA branch. That's where it all started. He's a little strange. So I was trying to figure out how on EARTH he was related to the Carters. Their daughter, Anna, just got back from a mission in New Zealand. She's fantastic. Their son, Andrew, is about to submit his mission papers. He's afraid of shots. Uh oh! But anyways, Sister Carter left to pick up her husband, so we were left with Andrew, Anna, and Kenny. We finished eating, and this blonde lady walks in in an orange sweater and pink bell bottoms with a tray of tilapia. The family goes, "Hey Aunt Tessa" in the most dull, "Sisters, we are so sorry" tone. She sits at the table and starts cutting up the fish and offers it to us. After we all say, "Oh no, we just ate", she puts a bite size piece of fish on my plate. Now, I wasn't going to be rude and not eat it. So, as I pick up my fork, she goes, "Kenny, you should try this!" and she scoops up the fish with her fork and thumb off of my plate. Thanks, Tessa...but it gets better. Sister Ketring and I were talking to Anna and Andrew about coming to the YSA since it's so small and we're trying to get people to come. So they're nodding their heads and agreeing to come, so we invited Kenny. He's 31 and that's the cut-off BUT we're desperate. So we tell them where and when the branch meets and Tessa chimes in and says, "Everett at 1 o'clock?" Okay, I'll try to be there." Y'all. The lady's at least 55....my life. Turns out, she's Kenny's mom. She's a child of God. It's fine. After dinner, we went to Dakota's. He's not really progressing anymore, but we did find out that his step-mom, Lissa, spent the weekend in a psych ward. We weren't too surprised! She roomed with a lady who claimed to be a "prophesier" and a man who yells, "Heil Hitler!" stole her sprite--they only get two sodas a day--and she chased him all around the psych ward and she broke her toe. Idahoans. Let me tell you. Now let me explain the subject of this e-mail to you. We met a lady, Sister Gonzales, who the Elders warned us of talking our ears off if she came outside. Well, she did. She started talking about dandelions and said, "Ya know, people mow their lawns, and pull weeds and throw them away, but what they don't realize is that they're throwing away perfectly good food." She then took the dandelion and stuck it in her mouth and ate to her heart's content. It took every inch of my being not to laugh. Trust me, after I'd held it in for five minutes, I got in the car and busted a gut. Oh my goodness. I love these people so friggin' much! By the way...Mom, I've come to LOVE asparagus! It's divine! But anyways, we had another seminary barbecue, but this time for Caldwell High School. The turnout wasn't as great as the barbecue at Vallivue, but it was fun. Elder Collette, one of the Spanish elders, saw a kid in a shirt and tie and said, "Right on! Future companion!" Turns out, that kid was a nonmember and though Collette was gay. But it's fine. The things missionaries say that get them into trouble.... We walked around the College of Idaho campus and, let me tell you. It's gorgeous! Too bad credits don't transfer there....otherwise....haha, just kidding! We had our first lesson with Anne, the Vietnamese girl that Mariah Funk introduced us to! It's so strange to me that she's never heard of Jesus Christ until she set foot in America. Wow. It's going to be fun to teach her about him. Sadly, at that point, we hadn't been able to get her a Vietnamese Book of Mormon. So that was stressful to not be able to read from the scriptures. She doesn't understand a whole lot of English, so the language barrier definitely makes teaching her a challenge! That night, we had dinner with the Chaineys and noticed a whole row of copies of the Book of Mormon in all kinds of languages. So Sister Ketring asked if they had a Vietnamese one. They did! Sister Chainey gave it to us to give to Anne. That was definitely a tender mercy of the Lord! Also this week, we found two new investigators while we were sitting around Grandma's house pricing things. The woman thinks she's going to die soon, but if it didn't happen when she went skydiving at 80 two years ago, she's got at least ten years left. So, Naomi still hasn't come to church. That's a downer, and so we have to move her baptism yet again. It's stressful, but we'll get there. I think if we can get her son, Bruce, to go to church, then we can get her to go. Oh well. We won't give up on her. Sunday was fabulous. We're starting to LOVE the YSA. They're all fabulous. We went to a fireside with the YSA last night, and it given by a man named Mike James. He went from Hell's Angels biker, drug addict, and disrespectful of women to completely converted to the gospel and sealed in the temple to his wife last September. It was truly moving. This week has made my love for missionary work skyrocket. I love it SO much. The laughs, the memories, the spirit...it's just grand. I love it. I wouldn't trade this sacrifice for anything. I don't even think of it as a sacrifice to serve the Lord for the next 15 and half months. It's a blessing and a privilege to be called to the work. I love Him so much. Have a fantastic week, everyone! The Lord knows and is mindful of ALL of you! He loves you! When in doubt, count your blessings. You'll be surprised :) I love you all! Love, Sister Tyler